Copulating With Our Kind, or: This Is Not About Difference
“I thought you might be German,” I say. “I’m South African,” he says, in a tone that implied that he’d clocked that I was. Oh,” I say, because it’s always nice to have something in common with a man we’re having sex with, and we think – like knowing someone’s star-sign – that we know … Read more
Three Men, One Day
1. The Italian Guy, Tate Modern, 11:00 The boy is a faggot, a nothing. He’s bored and small and humiliated by his non-job, this sitting here and handing out tickets to strangers, tourists in the city he thought he was coming to to have a better life in, to fall in love in, to be … Read more
All We Want: Neighbours to the Rescue
We don’t always like ourselves. We don’t always feel good about who we are. We don’t always wake up in the morning and think: Nice. We don’t always look forward to the day. There are times when we would rather not have any more days. Or nights. We are not always fans of existing. We … Read more
Animal Instincts: Men and Their Urges
When a beautiful man slips through your fingers there’s not much you can do. You might never see him again. In cities like London you are always losing people. Yesterday at the sauna I lost two. (Somewhere in my head is the Oscar Wilde line about the misfortune of losing one parent, but two!? he … Read more
Gay Man Has Sex with Woman, Almost
During the lunch break, while the others went for rice and chicken soup at Barshu on Frith Street, I went to one of those acupuncture/herbal medicine/massage places on Shaftesbury Avenue to try and get some relief from my shoulder and neck pain. A friend had suggested I go for a chair massage. They’re great, she … Read more
Doing It with Little Guys
Time passes and you forget. He was small, that you do remember, no more than 5′. His name was… what was his name? A Chinese name. Two characters. I think he said his name was William. Yes, I said, but is that your name in Malaysia, too? I showed off my ten words in Mandarin, … Read more
Being Inside (The Weeks of Nada)
I’ve been busy. Let’s just say I’ve been in a place where sex was not an option. Masturbation – yes; and a lot of that was done, so much so that I have started to think maybe I could spend the rest of my life having phone sex, coming up with various scenarios and talking … Read more
All You See Is: Man
Our physicality is also a narrative. What we look like is often how we are seen, and what people see is what they desire us for. Inside I am not a daddy, I am not masculine (whatever the fuck that means), I am not butch or tough or muscular. But on the outside I am … Read more
I’ll Be Back
The heat last night made it impossible for you to work or think. London has been gloriously hot for the past three days. But in your flat you were getting restless. You back was sticking to your chair – that’s how hot it was. Besides, you’d been working all day and you hadn’t had sex … Read more
The Kiss and the Revolution
Qu’est-ce que c’est a kiss? Wikipedia says it’s the meeting of the mouth with another mouth or other parts of the body, or an object. Kissing the way we know it here in the West is very much a Western thing. Not everyone kisses the way people kiss here. What we may think of as … Read more
